Ordinary Time

OK, so going back a bit to the church calender theme. Ordinary time. What is it?

In the Catholic and Anglican Church, it is the period of time following Epiphany and then following Pentecost. (Pentecost closes out Easter, and in Acts is the moment when Christ ascended and the Holy Spirit descended to provide counsel and power to the Church.)

The ordinary time following Epiphany is somewhat short. Sometimes just a matter of weeks or less. In the Anglican liturgical calender, it starts after the Candlemas celebration. (Candlemas closes our the 40 days of Epiphany.) For Catholics, it starts after the celebration of Christ's Baptism. (Which happens on Sunday a couple weeks after Christmas)

The longer period of Ordinary Time follows Pentecost and goes all the way to Advent, (which builds up towards Christmas.) The English name is intended to translate the Latin term Tempus per annum (literally "time through the year"). This longer stretch of ordinary time has been referred to by some as the spiritual desert of summer.  Bible study groups often form during Ordinary Time to keep their faith at the forefront when nothing big is happening in the church calender. 

I also wanted to write a bit on this post about Christian Feasts. But I think that I underestimated the complexity of that task. Many of the feasts originate with the original Jewish celebrations, but take on a different meaning emphasizing the Messiah. Some feast dates were changed to help incorporate pagans into the Christian traditions. Other feasts weren't even practiced until hundreds of years after Christ. (Like Epiphany for example.)

The first reference to Epiphany in the Latin West is a slighting remark by Clement of Alexandria in Stromateis, I, xxi, 45: "There are those, too, who over-curiously assign to the Birth of Our Saviour not only its year but its day…" Origen's list of festivals (in Contra Celsus, VIII, xxii) omits any reference to Epiphany. The first reference to an ecclesiastical feast of the Epiphany, in Ammianus Marcellinus (XXI:ii), is in 361AD.

OK...enough history for tonight. I think I've got the gist of the Church Calender down, at least in outline format in my mind. 

Tired again tonight. 

My days are full and long. What happened to the time in my life when I was so boooooored? Now that I'm interested in things, there isn't enough space to squeeze it all in. How is it that I used to spend hours at a time in pubs for happy hour? What empty, meaningless fun. I was dead in my transgressions. Zombie-like, going through the motions. It feels good to be alive, but I'm hearing the ticking of the clock for the first time too. I feel like there's so much to do...so much to catch up on.

Until tomorrow.

Christian Brothers

Went out with 3 friends from Church tonight for dinner. It was pretty awesome. I spent way too much money, the Spanish owner was way too intrusive, but time with the fellas was well spent. It was authentic.

The four of us are in leadership positions of one sort or another at church and the topic was living an authentic life for Christ while dealing with everything else. There was some heated debate. It's great to have brothers who will call you out when you're being judgmental and cheer you on when you're doing it right.

I'm learning to look past peoples personalities and to focus more on their heart and motives. I used to be very judgmental. If I didn't like someone...that was it for them. If they rubbed me the wrong way, they were dead to me. Who needed to waste time with someone who didn't make a very good first impression? Pretty callous and superficial. Now I'm trying hard to get past peoples personality quirks, (because I'm perfect right?), and focus more on their heart. There are a lot of annoying, well intentioned people out there. Ha! But when you focus on their heart, their outward issues become less obvious.

Work was very challenging today. Christ showed up big time and in a big way. The more faith you have, the more miracles he performs. God loves when you go out on a limb with your faith. He rewards it. In the Bible, it seems that Jesus is most happy when people believe he can come through, (Matt 9:22, 9:29, 15:28, 21:21) and most distressed when they feel he can't. (John 11:40)

Well, this post is brief and light in theology, but I'm tired. Very blessed, but tired. Much love. Jess

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Location:Rosehaven

More on Epiphany

Ok, so I did a little bit more reading up on Epiphany.

It lasts for 40 days after the celebration of the birth of Jesus. Different churches commemorate the ending differently and on different days. In Western tradition, the last day is highlighted by a 'Candlemas' celebration focusing on Luke 2:2 where Jesus is presented at the temple.

Within the Roman Catholic Church, since the liturgical reforms of the Second Vatican Council, this feast has been referred to as the Feast of Presentation of the Lord, with references to candles and the purification of Mary de-emphasised in favor of the Prophecy of Simeon the Righteous. Pope John Paul II connected the feast day with the renewal of religious vows.

In Eastern tradition the 40th day is celebrated with an All-Night Vigil on the eve of the feast, and a celebration of the Divine Liturgy the next morning, at which beeswax candles are blessed. This blessing traditionally takes place after the Little Hours and before the beginning of the Divine Liturgy (though in some places it is done after). The priest reads four prayers, and then a fifth one during which all present bow their heads before God. He then censes the candles and blesses them with holy water. The candles are then distributed to the people and the Liturgy begins. On the same day, Orthodox Christians also commemorate a wonder-working icon of the Theotokos known as "the Softening of Evil Hearts" or "Simeon's Prophecy." It depicts the Virgin Mary with her hands upraised in prayer, and seven swords piercing her heart. This is one of the few Orthodox icons of the Theotokos which do not depict the infant Jesus.

I think all of that stuff is really interesting, and I write it partly so I can remember it. Not all churches celebrate Christmas on the same day, and some churches highlight different parts of Jesus' formative years during the celebration. Because 40 days after Christmas could land on a different day every year according to the Gregorian Calender, this is one of the 'moveable feasts'. I also read that in some traditions, Christmas decorations are not taken down until the end of the Epiphany season. Is apparently, was an unknown rule that our family had been operating under for some time.

Much Love. Jess




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Location:Starbucks

Epiphany

During the sermon on Sunday, JY3 mentioned that this was Epiphany week. I remember thinking, awesome...what's Epiphany week? Which brings me back to something I often think about. 1) I need to get better versed in global geography. 2) I need to get a better understand of how our national government runs, and 3) I need to learn about the Church Calendar, and whether any of it matters any more.

For example...what is ordinary time? Yea, I don't know either. But I'm going to figure it out and blog about it tomorrow night.

I know that advent is the time of expectant waiting leading up to the birth of Jesus. Lent is the time leading up to Easter. I even recently got a grip on the whole Ash Wednesday/Maundy Thursday thing. But I feel like the church needs to do a better job explaining these things. Maybe I wasn't raised right, or I slept through confirmation...but I don't remember anyone ever telling me what Epiphany Week was growing up.

And then I look it up on Wiki, and it goes back to the 4th century and is the 3rd most important feast in the Eastern Orthodox faiths, behind Easter and Pentecost. That's kind of a big deal! (And what's up with the whole feast thing? I think it's a carry over from the old testament days, but maybe I'll save the feast post for Wednesday.)

Here's what I found out about Epiphany:

The observance had its origins in the Eastern Christian Churches and was a general celebration of the Incarnation of Jesus Christ. It included the commemoration of his birth; the visit of the Magi ("Wise Men", as Magi were Persian priests) to Bethlehem; all of Jesus's childhood events, up to and including his baptism in the Jordan by John the Baptist; and even the miracle at the Wedding of Cana in Galilee. It seems fairly clear that the Baptism was the primary event being commemorated. (Christ's birth is only found in two of the gospels, but his Baptism by John is covered in all four.)

Epiphany is celebrated by both the Eastern and Western Churches, but a major difference between them is precisely which events the feast commemorates. For Western Christians, the feast primarily commemorates the coming of the Magi; Eastern churches celebrate the Baptism of Christ in the Jordan. In both traditions, the essence of the feast is the same: the manifestation of Christ to the world (whether as an infant or in the Jordan), and the Mystery of the Incarnation.

Even before the year 354, the Western Church had separated the celebration of the Nativity of Christ as the feast of Christmas and set its date as December 25; it reserved January 6 as a commemoration of the manifestation of Christ, especially to the Magi, but also at his baptism and at the wedding feast of Cana.

Prior to 1976, the Anglican churches also observed an eight-day feast. Today the Epiphany is classified as a Principal Feast and is observed on January 6 or on the Sunday between January 2 and 8. There is also an Epiphany season, observed between the season of Christmas and the first period of Ordinary Time. It begins at Evening Prayer on the Eve of the Epiphany, and ends at Evening Prayer (or Night Prayer) on the Feast of the Presentation (which may be celebrated on February 2 or on the Sunday between January 28 and February 3).

I wonder why the Church stopped observing an eight day feast? Id like to make these kind of things more a part of my faith. I want to live out my faith, and not knowing anything about this kind of stuff can be frustrating. But also kind of exciting too. I'm going to learn more and make the Church calendar a focus of my posts this week.

Much love all. Jess

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Location:Rosehaven

Singing In Church

My favorite day of the week is Sunday. There's nothing better than getting spiritually recharged to deal with the upcoming work week. I'm not kidding, sometimes by the time Friday night hits, I feel like I need a Holy Spirit shower. My especially favorite Sundays are the one's in which my quartet group gets to sing. I thought I'd share a little bit.

I'm afraid it's a short post post today. I'm very tired, and I have yet to pray. I'm feeling God in my life more and more every day. I feel connected to Him more than I have in many years. My family is healthy, and I am very blessed.

In the news this week were the reports of Coptic Christians in the Middle East being persecuted, and a Congresswoman from Arizona being gunned down. The world is fallen, and people are desperate. There is a lot to pray for tonight. Much Love.

The Good News

Ok, so I had a thought today in the car as I was driving home from work. It hit me that most of my clients have a hard time taking complete responsibility for their actions. Sure, they'll take partial responsibility and be very sure to point out that they are owning up, but it's rarely complete responsibility.

And I think we're all like that to a certain degree. It started with Adam and Eve. Why'd you eat the apple? 'The woman you gave me told me to.' Why'd you eat the apple? 'The serpent told me to.'

It's clearly been going on for a long time. It's part of our make up. When we find ourselves in a jam, we often will blame the circumstances instead of ourselves. I often hear at work, 'I was just in the wrong place at the wrong time.' Right. Well, who put you there? Had you turned right instead of left, you wouldn't have pulled out in front of the cop and been charged with dwi. So it's left's fault?

Where am I going with all this? Well, later in the day I realized that from time to time I forget exactly what the good news of Jesus means. I actually find myself thinking...what's so great about Christianity again? And I find myself trying to find a way to formulate it into a clear concise message. And it's not easy. But it should be. And then I realized what I was struggling with.

My culture.

The same reason my clients have a hard time accepting fault and the impending punishment, is the same reason I forget how special a gift Christ has given me. In my culture, it is hard for me to take responsibility for what a miserable sinner I am. I have been brought up to imagine God as a loving father who's always rooting for me despite my failures.

But that isn't the God of my Bible. The God of scripture hates sin, and in fact...he hates the person who chooses to live a life of sin. (Psalm 5:5) He is a God of justice who doles out punishment and love. I don't like to think about God being angry with me, much less hating my choices and lifestyle. I don't like to completely own my brokenness in the face of God's perfection. I don't like to consider the times I choose to turn my back on him and purposefully sin. I would prefer to be blind to the harsh reality of justice.

God is holy above all: 1 Sam 2:2

He is righteous: Duet 32:4

Just in his wrath Rom 3:5,6

God's eyes are too pure to look upon evil, He can't tolerate wrong: Hab 1:13

The arrogant can't stand in His presence, He hates all who do wrong: Ps 5:5

Whoever rejects the Son will not see life, but feel God's wrath: John 3:36

Genesis 8:21 indicates that our heart holds the propensity for evil from the time we are born. Eph 4:18 says our understanding is darkened and our hearts are like stone. 2 Cor 4:4 says we can't even see Christ most of the time because of our spiritual blindness.

Is it any wonder that we would prefer to be blind to the reality of our flaws and our impending punishment? My job is interesting because I get to view a little piece of my spiritual brokenness, every time I have a client come in and explain to me why they don't really deserve their impending judgment. They provide me with a glimpse into my own soul, a microcosm for my misunderstanding as to why I need to be saved. No one wants to really fess up to their mistakes.

And that is exactly why I forget the good news of Christ. What exactly is the message? What exactly did he do for me? Well, in order to get the message, one has to understand the depth of the bind that they find themselves in. The spiritually blind have no idea that they are in some seriously eternal jeopardy. They have no idea what's at stake. So if there's nothing to take responsibility for, then there's no need for a savior. In fact, even when you've been saved, sometimes you can forget what a blessing it was to be pulled out of the mire. Because you can't imagine how close to the precipice you'd been standing. or maybe you deny the kind of punishment your crimes against God deserve.

Today's culture does us no favors as we come to terms with our faith. And it's certainly no help in our efforts to evangelize. With modernity comes amazing distractions and the false belief that we can get by without help. Everything is made so immediate and easy, we can get carried away by playing God in our own world. There's no real need to take responsibility because mistakes can be so easily corrected.

Camping is a cure all for me, because it reminds me of how alone, and helpless, and fragile I really am. Shivering at night, blanketed by the vast cosmos, hungry and fumbling to get a fire going...those are times I find myself understanding why people relied on God to get through their everyday. Normally I can be online for 8 hours in the warm confines of my living room, and I have no need to acknowledge my brokenness. The spiritual blinders become a bit narrower and more distracting. Who needs good news when I have immediate gratification with the swipe of a mouse?

Well...sorry this was quite a ramble. Just some thoughts as I work out my faith. The good news? Christ took my place, justice was served on the cross, and Love won out. I'm cloaked in love, and that love was draped over my shoulders by Gods son who was sent down to save me. But I will never understand how valuable that act was, unless I realize the danger I've put myself in by repeatedly turning away from God's Love. 

Good night all.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Location:Rosehaven

Don't Trust The Holy Bible?

Don't Trust The Bible? Check out these Books!

In 2007 at the beginning of my conversion, I decided that I would find highly reliable, the accounts of Jesus Christ as written by purely secular sources. I began reading up on Jesus and whether I could believe a lot of the Christian claims from an 'historical perspective'. What began to blow my mind was that...even when I completely ignored Christian scripture and the writings of the early church fathers, the ancient secular historians and authors still painted a picture of Jesus as God. 

Of course, the early Church Fathers wrote about Christ all the time...so much in fact, that if all the Christian Bibles disappeared from the face of the planet we could completely reconstruct the good book from their quotes alone. Origen for example quoted it in his letters and writings over 17,992 times. But my mission in '07 consisted of ignoring the writings of the early fathers to avoid any kind of idealogical bias or motive. I was more interested in what the enemies and the uninterested Roman historians said about Jesus.

Here's what I found:

Tacitus:

First Century Roman Historian: Wrote of the 'Christus' execution at the hands of the Roman Procurator Pontius Pilate. And a 'mischevius superstition' that broke out after his death. (See Tacitus. Annals. Can be found in: Great Books of the Western World Vol.15 - Hutchins or The Annals and the Histories. Tacitus. 1952) 

Suetonius:

Chief Secretary to Emporer Hadrian: Confirms Acts 18:2 (The Twelve Ceasers. Trans. Robert Graves. Revised by Michael Grant 1979)

Josephus:

Jewish Historian working under Roman Authority. Wrote between 70-90 AD. Makes statements that verify, either generally or in great detail the historical nature of the old and new testaments. (So you don't have to flip through his massive volumes, I'd highly reccomend: F.F. Bruce'sThe New Testament Documents: Are They Reliable?

Thallus: 

Wrote around 52 AD. Don't know a lot aout this guy...except that he is quoted by a lot of early writers. Julius Africanus is one of them that quoted his writings in 221 AD. Thallus wrote of a darkness that descended after the crucifiction: "On the whole of the world there was pressed a most fearful darkness, and the rocks were rent by an earthquake, and many places in Judea and other districts were thrown down." (See Julius Africanus, Chronology.) Good luck finding that one...I have it cited in Evidence for Christianity pg 86 by Josh McDowell.

Pliny the Younger: 

Roman author and administrator. In a letter to Emperor Trajan AD 112, describes the worship practices of Christians. Establishes that Christ was, at this early date, worshiped as God. Description portrays a very similar one to todays' worship. (Find in Pliny The Elder. Natural History. Rackham & Jones. 1951 OR Pliny The Younger. Letters. which is quoted in Norman Geisler's Baker's Encyclopedia of Christian Apologetics. 1998) 

Emperor Trajan: In a reply to Pliny's letter, discusses how to deal with the Christians. (See above for references.)

Jewish Talmud: 

Compiled between 70 and 200 AD during the so called 'Tannaitic Period'. Refers to the Rabbi Yeshu as being hanged, for practicing sorcery and enticing Israel to Apostasy. Says he was Hanged on the eve of Passover. Of course, this confirms the date, and that the Jews of that time acknowledged that Jesus performed Miracles. Which the N.T. also states. (The most significant bit is found in the Sanhedrin 43a of theBabylonian Talmud)

Lucian of Samosata:

A 2nd century Greek writer whose works contained sarcastic critiques of Christianity, but confirmed many N.T. claims in doing so. (see The Works of Lucian of Samosata. Fowler & Fowler. 1949. Found inside that book in Lucians' "Death of Pelegrine". OR for an easier find...see Gary Habermas' "The Historical Jesus: Ancient Evidence for the life of Christ. pg. 206-7.1996)

Mara Bar-Serapion:

A Syrian, in a letter to his son compares the Greek killing of Socrates to the Jewish Killing of Christ, and that Christ lives on in his teaching...(You'd have to go to the British Museum and read this in Syriac...or you can check it out in Habermas' Hist. of Jesus...pg.200)

Valetinas:

"The Gospel of Truth" is a book written midway through the 1st century. Perhaps by a Gnostic named Valetinas. "Jesus was patient in accepting sufferings since he knows that his death is life for many..." (See A New Quest for the Historical Jesus by James M. Robinson 1959)

The Acts of Pontius Pilate:

This is a famous history book that has been lost. However it is referred to by Justin Martyr in AD 150 and Tertullian in AD 200.  Martyr says that it describes the miracles of Jesus, the piercing of the hands and feet, the casting of lots for the clothing...which were prophecied in the O.T. of course. (See Justin Martyr. Apology. found in Ante-Nicene Fathers by Alexander Roberts and James Donaldson. Pages 35 & 48 should be helpful.)

In essence, these non religious/secular writings demonstrated that:


1) Jesus was from Nazareth.
2) He lived a wise and virtuous life.
3) Crucified under Pilate at Passover, a 'Jewish King'.
4) Disciples believed he was raised from the dead.
5) Enemies acknowledged his sorcery. (Miracles...)
6) Small band of disciples multiplied rapidly.
7) From the beginning, his disciples denied Polytheism, and worshiped Christ as Divine.


That's really exciting. Because it indicates that I believe what the early Christians believed. My worship service is similar to that of the first believers. I believe Christ was divine, and so did they.

For me, the next logical step lie in questioning and testing the veracity of holy scripture. It really didn't take long to uncover the fact that the Bible is by far the most historically accurate manuscript to come out of the ancient world. Twenty five thousand hand written copies in a bunch of languages compared to 650 for the second most accurate...'Homer's Iliad'. (No one ever questions who wrote the Iliad...even though the first full handwritten copy was penned 600 years after Homer first set the story to parchment in 800 B.C.) To keep this post relatively manageable, it will have to suffice to say that I began to feel very reassured that an amazing case could be made for the reliability of the Bible. And HAD been made time and time again by men much more brilliant than I'd ever be. Ever since, I have done my best to develop an open heart towards Christ...and I daily ask that he becomes more and more a part of my identity.

A lawyer once asked Jesus 'Whats the most important commandment?' Jesus said 'Love the Lord your God with all your Heart, Soul, and Mind." We are supposed to use our Minds. As a new Christian, I feel it's important to arm myself with the knowledge to defend my faith. Be vigilant. Christ is the way and the truth. There is  no question that can't be answered through him. 

Much love!

Courage

I'm not a fan of flying. In fact, I'm deathly afraid of it. And yet, about a month ago I felt the strong call to book a plane flight for the annual Anglican 1000 conference in Plano, Texas. So later this month I'll be flying high on my way to hang out with the leaders of the ACNA. Pretty awesome. Not to mention the chance to hear Tim Keller speak is a blessing. His book 'A Reason For God' is at the top of my list.

The nice thing is...I have felt a great peace about boarding the plane for these flights. (There will be four total.) Please understand that my fear of flying goes pretty deep. I can even feel queasy when watching a plane in the air as I'm safely anchored to the earth. So actually living through turbulence can be traumatic for me. And I know it's completely irrational and that it's the safest way to travel etc. But none of that really helps me deal with the fear. I had my man card pulled the time I was with my wife and I actually cried. Yea. I'm not kidding.

So...I've decided to man up. As Saint Paul would have said...I board the plane with the earnest expectation and hope that I will in no way be ashamed, but will have sufficient courage so that now as always Christ will be exalted in my body, whether by life or by death. (Phil 1:20)

In other words...I'm going to be a man about it. Live or die...I do it in Christ's name. In Christ I have found something worth losing everything for. I'm going to abandon myself this year, and respond to God's call. When Jesus called to his disciples and said 'follow me', they didn't wonder about whether they'd be safe...they did it. They turned away from their earthly concerns about their careers and their families, and their mortgages...and they went. Dietrich Bonhoeffer wrote that the first call of every Christian experience is to abandon the attachments of this world. He stated further in his book The Cost of Discipleship, that 'when Christ calls a man, he bids him come and die.'

If I were to refuse to fly, I'd be telling God he wasn't enough. I'd be saying that my faith in his call is not strong enough to risk my temporal existence for His eternal promises. He would become negotiable, but my fear of losing my known existence could not. It would be a demonstration of my lack of thankfulness for Christ's enduring sacrifice. In fearing for my own life, I tell Christ that I'm unconvinced about the depth and effectiveness of the cross. 

So I'm getting on the plane with a clear conscience. I've heard the call, and I'm forgetting my fears to do Christ's bidding. I'm dying to my concerns, and living in Christ.

My Prayer for this trip:

"Lord only in your presence are fullness and joy forever more. (Ps. 16:11) My life that I am working so hard to preserve will only wear away as time moves on, but your promises to me will last forever. I live by your sheer grace! That means although I don't deserve things to go right, I know you are working them all out for good because you love me in Christ. Rom. (8:28) My security in life is not based on luck or hard work, but on your gracious love for me. You have counted every hair on my head (matt. 10:30 ) and every tear down my cheeks (ps. 56:8). You love me far more and better than anyone else loves me, even more than I love myself. 

You have told me that there is no condemnation for me now. (Rom. 8:1) you delight and sing over me (Zeph 3:14-17) Let me be satisfied with your love. (Ps. 90-14) My God, take this fear from my heart, and replace it with love and trust for you. Through the Holy Spirit, replace my inequities and anxieties with the power of the risen Christ. Grant me the courage to fly. In Jesus name I humbly pray. Amen."

Challenges

Well, life isn't perfect. Ever have those days where you just wake up a bit grumpy? Today was like that for me. Generally Reba and I say a prayer together to get the day started. Here it is:

Heavenly Father, according to your word, I present my body a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable in your sight. (Rom 12-1) 

This morning I gird my loins about with truth. I put on the breastplate of righteousness; I shod my feet with the preparation of the Gospel of Peace. Above all, I take the shield of faith wherewith I shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked. And, I take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the spirit, which is the Word of God. (Eph 6-14) 

I put on the garment of praise and I thank you for the armor you have provided for me to dress in this day. I am completely covered, IN THE NAME OF JESUS, I have donned a garment of praise according to your word, Father. (Isa 61:3) 

Upon Jesus, I have built my life, my home and my marriage, and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it. (Matt 16:18) 

You are my shepherd, I shall not want. (Psalm 23:1) 

For you have supplied all my needs according to your riches in glory, and I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. (Phil 4:19,13) 

I praise you for walking in divine health, for you are my God who heals all my diseases, and by your wounds I am healed. I just praise you and thank you for my prosperity and good health, even as my soul prospers. (Psalm 103:2, Isa 53:5, 3John2) 

The Joy of the Lord is my Strength! (Neh 8:10)

Father, I have prayed according to your word, and you have said you watch over your word to ensure it's fulfilled. (Jer 1:12) Rise up and live big within me today Lord, for I am yours, IN JESUS NAME. Amen.

Remember: Every spoken word becomes a living thing - to minister or to destroy. (Prov 18:21, 6:8, 4:20-22)

We didn't say it together this morning. And whenever we forget to do it...my day starts off a bit Blah. When my day starts off blah, then a self fulfilling prophecy of bad stuff starts to happen. For example, I was running a little late this morning. I swung into starbux, the place was jam packed. I'm talking silly busy. And sure enough, I get behind the person that feels the need to 'special order' their food...that they need cooked, toasted, microwaved...all to specification. I felt like saying...look lady...we're in a coffee shop. Order some 'expletive' coffee. (But I'm not cursing this year...that's the old Baltimore Jesse creeping back in.) But I continued thinking...If your'e that hungry for breakfast, I'm going to need you to vacate the line and head to Ihop. Because this is ridiculous. So of course, when it's finally my turn, I bump her aside and in a wholly unchristian and passive aggressive way, I say loudly enough for everyone to hear..."I'd just like a medium regular coffee please...that's it...that's all for me! Yup...no problems here etc.' (That showed her didn't it! Very pleased with myself, I proceeded to pour some into the trash can to make room for my cream.)

I got in my car, barely missed colliding with someone who was pulling out without looking, (unbelievable! I think to myself...these people this morning!!) and proceeded to head to court. As soon as I approached the light at a major intersection, it turned green. Great! I thought...I'm catching a break. Boy do I deserve one after that lady slowed me down in starbux. But then I notice the car in front of me isn't moving. It's hard for me to tell if there is a line in front of him because the winter sun is low in the sky and blinding me. I'm straining to see what's going on, and I finally see that he's lost, there's no one in front of him...and the seconds of my green are slowly ticking away. I lay on the horn. All of a sudden the guy guns it. He hits the gas. I do the same. I see the light turn yellow as we're about 20 yards from the intersection. He barely makes it through...I don't.

I've gotta tell you...I havn't cursed like that since last year. I mean, I let it fly. I waved my arms about, flung up the finger as he drove off into the blinding sunrise, and did all sorts of other stuff that would probably be hilarious to watch on video at this point. I immediately opened my iphone notes and started a new one called 'pet peeves', and described the incident. It was cathartic, but only a little bit.

And then I came to my senses. What in the world am I so worked up about? Out of everything going on in this world, all the people suffering real violence and hardship, and my life so blessed...what am I going on about?? It's a traffic light...that's it!

So I prayed...hard...right there in the car. (I had plenty of time, since that light takes foreeeever to change since most of the morning traffic is flowing the other way.) But God is so good. He's such a resource. I was slowly filled with peace. I put on some ancient Byzantine hymns for the rest of the ride.  By the time I got to the courthouse I was fine. But it shows, despite putting God in my life big time over the past month...it doesn't make me this all of a sudden perfect person. It doesn't mean life isn't going to be filled with challenges big and small. Sometime it seems like more challenges in fact. But it feels so great to be comforted by my loving father who is there with me always. Just an amazing resource.  Well, I gotta run...Reba and Noah just walked in the door. Much love. 

The Church Community

Tomorrow I'm having lunch with a good friend of mine. He is the lead rector of a start up Anglican Church in West LA. I've hung out in LA, and have some friends from Cali. He's got his hands full for sure. Not a whole lot of JC vibe going on over there on the left coast. The only place I can think of that may be more of a spiritual wasteland is the tech area of northern California. Unfortunately my brother lives out there, and it has completely crushed his faith in God. But that's a sad topic for another day.

So I'm excited about seeing my friend tomorrow. I'm finding that being surrounded by a community of believers is key. (Although I've always found the idea of a life of solitude in prayer quite romantic. I've had images of running away from it all and joining a monastery so that I could have my own cell with a wooden stool and a bible. But maybe it was the running away from it all that sounded so appealing.) My faith is often replenished and restored by meeting with my brothers in Christ. I often leave feeling as renewed as I do after a solid session of prayer.

In the sermon last Sunday, my friend I'm meeting with tomorrow spoke of the Body of Christ. He talked about how we're all called to do different things, but we are functioning as part of Christ's body. The work that we're doing is a continuance of the work Christ did while he was here. We are instructed to carry on in his name. There is nothing more important. We all have different strengths and callings. A good way to find out what your'e called to do in the Body of Christ is to follow your passion. But even more importantly, when we meet live and work together...I think there's a sense of Christ being present in more of a complete way. And thus when I'm with fellow Christians, I feel very alive.

I looked up some passages that refer to the Body. They are all Pauline. Paul was an amazing orator. He was his own lawyer in Acts, and it turns out he didn't have a fool for a client. He developed a lot of the theology behind the Body, and here's some of what he has to say about it.

1 CORINTHIANS 12:27
27 Now you are the body of Christ, and members individually.

1 CORINTHIANS 1:10,13
10 Now I plead with you, brethren, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that you all speak the same thing, and that there be no divisions among you, but that you be perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment.
13 Is Christ divided? . . . .

EPHESIANS 5:30
30 For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones.The Church, or Body of Christ, is composed of many members. Not every member has the same function or calling. God did not create or call each member to do the same thing.

ROMANS 12:4-8
4 For as we have many members in one body, but all the members do not have the same function,
5 so we, being many, are one body in Christ, and individually members of one another.
6 Having then gifts differing according to the grace that is given to us, let us use them: if prophecy, let us prophesy in proportion to our faith;
7 or ministry, let us use it in our ministering; he who teaches, in teaching;
8 he who exhorts, in exhortation; he who gives, with liberality; he who leads, with diligence; he who shows mercy, with cheerfulness.

1 CORINTHIANS 12:12,14,17-27 NKJ
12 For as the body is one and has many members, but all the members of that one body, being many, are one body, so also is Christ.
14 For in fact the body is not one member but many.
17 If the whole body were an eye, where would be the hearing? If the whole were hearing, where would be the smelling?
18 But now God has set the members, each one of them, in the body just as He pleased.
19 And if they were all one member, where would the body be?
20 But now indeed there are many members, yet one body.
21 And the eye cannot say to the hand, "I have no need of you"; nor again the head to the feet, "I have no need of you."
22 No, much rather, those members of the body which seem to be weaker are necessary.
23 And those members of the body which we think to be less honorable, on these we bestow greater honor; and our unpresentable parts have greater modesty,
24 but our presentable parts have no need. But God composed the body, having given greater honor to that part which lacks it,
25 that there should be no schism in the body, but that the members should have the same care for one another.
26 And if one member suffers, all the members suffer with it; or if one member is honored, all the members rejoice with it.
27 Now you are the body of Christ, and members individually.

EPHESIANS 4:11-16
11 And He Himself gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers,
12 for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ,
13 till we all come to the unity of the faith and the knowledge of the Son of God, to a perfect man, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ;
14 that we should no longer be children, tossed to and fro and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, in the cunning craftiness by which they lie in wait to deceive,
15 but, speaking the truth in love, may grow up in all things into Him who is the head -- Christ --
16 from whom the whole body, joined and knit together by what every joint supplies, according to the effective working by which every part does its share, causes growth of the body for the edifying of itself in love.







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Location:Rosehaven

Balancing work with faith

So I had my first full day at work since I've really committed to putting my faith first. It's a tough balance. The world is so...well worldly. I find myself falling into the criminal defense attorney role that I grew accustomed to before I came into the faith. Chain smoking, cursing, drinking, never a care win or lose....that was the lifestyle.

I don't smoke cigarettes anymore, I don't drink anymore, but the cursing and general hard core attitude creeps in now and again. Especially when I'm trading war stories with other attorneys. I told myself I'd stop cursing this year, and it's proved a bit challenging. Don't get me wrong, it's not like I tend to drop the F bomb or anything...but even the occasionally damn is something I'm trying to cut out. The less I immerse my self in base behavior, the more I hear gods voice and the less I'm tempted to engage in earthly desires.

Being a criminal defense attorney will wear you out unless you develop a pretty thick and calloused skin. I was trained by some of the most Godless and rebellious trial attorneys out there. And they were good. Juries loved them. But they knew nothing of the peace of Christ. I'm trying to learn to avoid burnout not by becoming hardened, but by becoming clothed with Christ. I want to exercise patience and a softer understanding with my clients questions, but be prepared to go to battle when needed. Christ was as gentle as a lamb, but he also knew how to turn over a table when need be.

Well, that's enough for now. I'm going to pray until bed time. I've got some reading to do too. Until tomorrow.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Location:Rosehaven

I Believe

It's amazing how God speaks to His children. It's such a subtle nuance, but so powerful. It's almost an indiscernible whispering that will go completely unnoticed, until you begin to practice tuning Him in. The more I listen for Him, the more I place myself in His presence...the more I can hear Him, and the more He shows up. 

If I was forced to explain it, I can think only of two real life comparisons. 

1) Before someone spends time going to the gym, they think they look fine. Pretty average perhaps, but nothing seriously lacking. Then they start working out. A week or two goes by without noticing much of anything. But sooner than later, they begin to feel muscles they never knew existed...they begin to see musculature emerging that had been residing beneath an inch of fatty tissue. All of a sudden, they become excited to see more. What once seemed adequate suddenly appears quite unsatisfactory in hindsight. And the quest to really get in shape begins. 

2)The second example I can think of is when you buy a new car. I drove around for 20 years and never once noticed a Ford Focus on the road. I never knew to, or had a reason to, notice one. Then I bought one last year. I was amazed at how many Ford's I noticed on the highway. Who knew I had been passed this many times by a Ford Focus! Now they're all I see! All this time, oblivious to the Focus...now I can't drive down the road without seeing one.

I think it's like that with God's voice. I've been focusing on Him for weeks. Calling out to Him, doing my best to be in His presence. At first nothing dramatic. Just a calm assuredness that I was not alone. But then, He began to show up and speak to me in my everyday life.

Some stories:

Earlier this week I was looking online for a timeline chart of major old testament charactors. I couldn't find much. 2 days later, my wife and I swung by the Christian Bookstore. I think she had to return something. I began browsing the Theology section. A discount sticker caught my eye. Before I even read the title, I grabbed the book off the bottom shelf. It was an Old Testament treatise by one of my favorite authors and a gentleman that I've met several times...Norman Geisler. Although I collect his work, this was a book I had never seen before. How providential I thought! Half off! I cracked it open, and the first page I came to was a timeline of ancient biblical charactors. From Noah on down the line. 

Hello God.

Also this week, I've been calling out to God about how I can best serve Him over the next couple of decades. Spending a lot of time in prayer, and gearing up for a New Year of discernment. So I get to Church today and my good friend who's planting a church in LA is giving the sermon. And wouldn't you know, his main point is to put God first and to behave like part of Christ's Body as we were called to do. To sacrifice and take a risk on what God intends for our lives. Challenging us to question whether we are inviting God into our plans, or whether we are accepting God's invitation for His plans. Convicting. And directly answering my prayers.

Hello God. I am here.

Last week, I was reading about death and the references to Heaven in the Bible etc. Later, I pull up at a red light and the license plate in front me said etrnlif. Eternal Life! Are you kidding me? The list goes on and on. When this stuff happened early on in my conversion I remember being stunned. Like when the title of the sermon was 'Good News, Bad News' the morning after I found out I had failed the NC Bar exam...and Reba had passed. But God's voice is not uncommon, when you include Him in a dialogue. Muscles will begin appearing when you spend time on them, Ford's will begin popping up everywhere when you're driving in one.

God will appear if you ask Him to. He still answers.

Now...none of these things would have meant anything to me if I hadn't been purposefully putting myself in God's presence. I wouldn't have noticed who wrote the discounted book, the chart on the first page I flipped to wouldn't have mattered, I wouldn't have been stung by the sermon today in church, and in my old life I probably would have muttered 'Jesus Freak' when I read the license plate in front of me at that stop light. None of it would have had any meaning for me at all. Nothing ever amounted to anything more than the odd coincidence - and even that was rare.

But I've started 'spiritually working out' and made that commitment to honing myself as part of  the Body of Christ. I've bought the ''spiritual new car' with the onstar connection to JC...and now I notice God in ways I never knew existed before. I'm seeing Him in places I never knew I was supposed to look. I'm finally hearing His voice when he had been whispering to me my whole life. Who knows how many times He rolled passed me on the highway? He speaks with a quiet understanding that bowls me over with power and clarity. God is on point if you take the time to communicate with Him. He shows up. He's real, and it's exciting.

Getting Ready For Church

It can really be a challenge to set aside the worries of work on Sunday. I often feel the anxiety of a rough work week looming around the corner.

Prayer is helpful. I'm a huge fan of technology and I have found the following apps to be a great resource.

http://www.cph.org/p-18058-pray-now-iphoneipod-app.aspx (Lutheran)

http://www.iphonelectionary.com/ (Episcopal)

A great web site to use as a tool is: http://www.oremus.org/ (Anglican)

Of course, those are all protestant and fitting with what I feel most aligns with God as he's revealed himself.

What can be frustrating for a proddy like me is that...the best prayer apps online and on itunes are Catholic. I used to listen to the Universalis and Divine Office apps, but there was just too much praying to the Virgin Mary. I can't feel comfortable focusing that much time on intercessory help when I've got a direct line to JC. But that's me. In terms of format and audio presentation, the Catholics are running the hi tech prayer market right now.

I'm part of the ACNA, and I think it would be imperative to ride the crest of technology when it comes to evangelism. The younger generations are all about staring at the computer screen, and there may be no better way to connect with them. I need to develop this...

Well, off to Church. One of my good friends is giving the sermon today. He boldly left our little Antioch to plant an Anglican church in the spiritual wasteland of LA. He's been an inspiration, so I'm looking forward to hearing from him.

Day One

Why this blog? I'm challenging myself to make 2011 a year of holiness. I'm daring myself to find out what it's like to live according to God's plan for my life. I'm committed to writing something in this blog for 365 straight days in order to better understand my Christian faith, and to what extent I'm called to be a leader in the faith.

What inspired all this?

For some reason...perhaps many reasons...after having 34 'fun' filled and aimless years, I begin wondering what it was all about. I began envisioning my death and having this sinking feeling that it was all going to be for naught. I felt motivated to understand whether there was any hope for this life. I didn't want to be at the end of my stay on Earth, wondering if I lived to the utmost.

In 2007 I began to embrace the hope that can only be found in the risen Christ. I found fairly quickly, once you come into contact with the living Christ, many of your former pastimes become trite in comparison. Which is actually quite good when you're hoping to quit boozing, carousing, womanizing, and all the other things that go along with an inflated ego and too much free time.

Along with this blog, I'll be praying for an hour a day. Some people work out, I'm going to be pumping the spiritual iron. 30 minutes in the morning and 30 minutes at night. Not a big sacrifice when there's 24 hours per day. Devoting somewhere around 5% of my time to the God that created not only me but the universe...well, it doesn't seem like it should be too hard. I also want to devote time to this set prayer, so that I can praise God without doing it only when I need him for something. All too often I'm communing based on a spur of the moment desire for help. That's not good enough.

There will also be time devoted to my church of course. I am absolutely in love with the group of people that I worship with every Sunday. We worship and commune with God in the Anglican style and it has been a perfect blend of spirituality, evangelism, and liturgy. I've learned a lot through the blessings of some great, young, spiritual leaders. Part of the purpose of this year is to determine whether I am cut out to lead an Anglican Church. And more importantly, am I being called to do that?

Professionally, things are really starting to become promising. I have a lot of opportunities for worldly success and the time to seize those possibilities will be ironically...at the end of this year. In December of 2011, I will need to decide whether God is calling me to a life of service, or rather...is he encouraging me to continue on in my very worldly profession as a devout and orthodox Christian.

These journal entries will help me to evaluate the process.

Location:Rosehaven